Whelp, it's not easy let me tell you. I guess for me I choose to figure out what I am grateful for. What is going for me and focus on that.
Here's a story for you:
A few months ago I had an incident involving my dog & roommate. My 2 year old lab got a hold of her stuffed animals and needless to say they ended up with a few holes & missing eyes. These toys had sentimental meaning to her and of course I felt horrible. But the fact was that it was an accident. I had opened the doors to air the house out and the bears were attacked. The following weeks were miserable. I was attacked via Facebook (by her, her friend's, even her mother sent me a nasty email), I was attacked via text & made to feel awkward in my own home. My initial instinct was to fight back. But I did not. In fact I did everything I could to fix the situation. Yet was still treated horribly. Now I'm not telling you this to vent (although it feels kind of good) I'm telling you this to let you know that I chose to remain calm & be the adult. And you know what, it paid off. Not on her side so much. But I feel better to this day. But was I too passive?
So what is the line between too nice & being the bigger person? I struggle with this as I hate confrontation. I think I need some mean lessons. My sister is great at speaking her mind (maybe too much sometimes, sorry A) but I'm bad at it. So I admire this quality. I need some middle ground bitch lessons. As i know there are times you can't just let it go. Someone help me with this!
"When a man gives his opinion he's a man.
When a woman gives her opinion she's a bitch."
-Bette Davis
I've never regretted speaking my mind. Perhaps I have regretted the way I went about it but some things need to be said. And some people need to get a clue. So I consider it an act of service to the ignorant people of this world. Being the bigger person only feels good if you actually feel bigger at the end of it. Being the bigger person who gets shit on doesn't do any good.
ReplyDeleteI don't ever regret speaking my mind... Sometimes I can tell that people attempt to make me feel regret for doing such but I can't allow it. God gave me a mind, so I use it. He gave me a mouth, so I use it. I was one for letting people take advantage of me and for always being "the bigger person" but then one day I realized that because I was being the "bigger person" I was more of a target... the bigger person is a bigger stepping stone and that does not fit your description the same as it did not fit mine. You stand up for yourself and you stand up for what is right. I believe in being reasonable, unbiased and just.. So take the step back, evaluate the situation, then take action and start walking... but don't be anyone's stepping stone. I have lived and experienced it in both ways. Being the "bigger person" doesn't make the situation better or go away.. it just sweeps it under the rug... but even that doesn't get rid of the dirt. Ya know? That just puts the mess under the flapjack rug, so whenever you pick that up, the f*^)ing mess is still there! So, stand up for yourself, deal with the dirt and prevail. Once you know you did everything you could, that's being the real "bigger person" and more importantly, being the better person (who is totally way cuter anyway...)
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